Anyway, without further ado, here's the description in all its glory:
POSITION: Circulation Staff Assistant (no benefits)
10:00 PM � 2:00 AM, Sunday � Tuesday
6:00 PM � 10:00 PM Friday & Saturday
During the academic year
DEPARTMENT: Library
EXPECTED APPOINTMENT DATE: As soon as possible
ESSENTIAL FUNCTIONS: Assists patrons of Library at the Circulation Desk, responds to emergencies, monitors the noise level of the library, shelves books as needed and performs other duties as assigned.
QUALIFICATIONS: High School diploma. Computer knowledge helpful. Must be able to work with minimal supervision. Experience in working with the public preferred.
TO APPLY: Contact Catbert, Evil HR Director
DEADLINE: Review will begin immediately and continue until position is filled.
Let's see...the duties don't mention dealing with assholes, ILLs, reference, IT and pretty much everything else because you will be the only adult there after 10 PM. Nothing about how this job sucks away your energy and your very SOUL and turns you into the surly office drone you always deplored in the past. And they don't mention that a good deal of your salary will be eaten away by sodas that cost $1.50. Bah. I will automatically NOT respect anyone who applies for this job. Hell, I don't even respect myself.
