A little note from your friendly local librarian:
Hi. I would like to make a few suggestions, just some things to think about before your next visit:
1. It would be helpful if you had some working knowledge of computers. See, I'd like to help you, really. It's just that, well, I'm the only one here and I don't really have the time to hold your hand through the process of using a computer. I can help you with little things, but I can't do them for you. Maybe you should sign up for our next computer class.
2. Stop pounding on the keyboard. Your big, meaty fingers are damaging it. Stop that.
3. Yelling at the computer won't make it work. Yelling at me doesn't work, either. It's not my fault or the computer's fault that you are stupid.
4. Please stop hacking all over the computer and keyboard. Cover your mouth when you cough, lest your stupidity is contagious!
5. We can't give away everything for free. Don't give me the usual crap about how your taxes pay for the library. In reality, your taxes probably contribute about a dollar or so. That will hardly cover the cost of you printing out funny e-mails from your cousin about some sort of hunting accident hilarity. It's 25 cents a page, taxes or not!
6. This really has nothing to do with computers or libraries, but, maybe you should see a dentist. Chronic bad breath is usually a symptom of something else, also, a timely visit might save your remaining teeth from suffering the same fate as the others.
Thank you. Have a nice day!
