I was reading the stacks back in the 700s, pulling old books and putting the shelves in order when I pulled out an obviously dated book about movie special effects...this book touted Star Wars as the end all be all of special effects movies, so, dated, as I said. Anyway, as I pulled the book to throw it on the discard pile, a USED CONDOM flopped out onto my hand.
AHHHHHH! They could hear my shrieking miles away.
Now, admittedly, my experience with condoms, used or otherwise, is slightly limited, but like someone once said, "I know 'em when I see 'em."
So, continuing to shriek, I shook my hand until the condom flew off and landed on the floor. Then, I ran to the bathroom and washed my hands with anti-bacterial soap and scalding hot water until my hands were pink and I no longer felt contaminated.
We keep rubber gloves around for...well, situations like this, I guess, so I snapped them on and gingerly picked up the icky thing, wrapped it in about a dozen paper towels and threw it away. Then, I withdrew the book and threw it away, too. And, after all that, I took off the gloves, threw them in the trash and washed my hands again for good measure.
Yuck, yuck, yuck and YUCK!!
I wanna go home now and take a shower. This is worse than the time I found a book in the men's bathroom floor decorated with mysterious yellowish stains. People are so gross.
I think I'm going to go wash my hands again.
