Mark Twain

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.


Dorothy Parker

Ducking for apples - change one letter and it's the story of my life.


Bertrand Russell

There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge.

Listy McListerton


2005-03-08 at 10:41 p.m.

I stole it from The Purple Chai. She stole it from someone else. My arms hurt from exercise and I can't type. Viva the list!

the scar you're most proud of: I have this wicked one straight down my back from a protruding screw on the merry-go-round when I was 7. That's right. I was maimed by playground equipment. But you know, back when I was a kid, all we had to play with was some rusty nails, splintery boards and some homeless guy.

your favourite condiment: depends on the food. On hotdogs: relish, mustard and onions. on burgers,pickles, mustard and onions. on corndogs, mustard. wait. I sense a theme here. mustard.

if you have freckles: indeed I do.

your preferred method of cooking: besides pressing the buttons on the microwave, I also like to cook Mexican food because it's dangerous.

what shoes you're wearing: I'm about to exercise (shock!), so, my sneakers.

how many children you have: 0, unless, you know, aliens impregnated me and I didn't know it.

the first person you french kissed: my hand.

your preferred breed of dog: Jack Russel terrier

where you were born: El Paso, TX

what colour underwear you're wearing: hot pink. yeah, I'm sassy.

where your keys are right now: dammit!

if you have split ends: no, I condition.

when you last got laid: in a past life, one where I was a slut.

your opinion on airline food: last airline food I had was pizza from a pizza place in Detroit that catered to the airline. It was good. No wonder they went bankrupt.

what cosmetic surgery you would consider: butt implants!

best kiddie playground equipment to have sex on: ewww. you would get sand in bad, bad places.

your worst malady Ongoing: besides the weight? ummm...angst?

if your mum loves your dad: probably. why else would she put up with his crap? especially these days because she has to take care of him.

if you can sing well: only in my head.

what your olympic event would be: speed snarking

someone you admire: my grandma

which country would be hardest for you to locate on a map: one of those little breakaway republics, like where-the-hell-is-it-stan.

the last time you cried: real crying or not real, hormone induced crying? real crying, a couple of weeks ago. hormone crying, yesterday.

your most interesting sexual congress location: they're having sex in congress?!

part of the Sunday papers you read first: NY Times Book Review

the languages you speak: English, a smattering of French and Spanish

the religion you were raised with: Be mellow-ism

if you can draw well: well, if Jackson Pollock is an artist, why can't I be?

your favourite photograph: too many to count.

what you should be doing instead of this: exercising

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