Mark Twain

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.


Dorothy Parker

Ducking for apples - change one letter and it's the story of my life.


Bertrand Russell

There is much pleasure to be gained from useless knowledge.

The Swarm


2003-10-07 at 1:55 a.m.

I am writing to you from my deathbed. Okay, maybe not. I am a wuss and I have the flu. Blargh. I was so sick today that, for the first time in a long time, I TOOK THE DAY OFF! (Gasp! No!) It's true. I took some Tylenol PM and didn't wake up until 6:30 this evening. Ahh...better living through chemistry.

But the real reason I'm writing tonight is to ask an important question: what the hell is up with all these wasps?

It started in the bathroom. One or two wasps buzzing around. Special K (my roommate) and I decided that they must have gotten in through the window, so we closed it. More wasps. One flew into my mouth while I was brushing my teeth. YARG!!! BLAHHH!!

We decided that we must have some sort of gap or something in the window frame. I poked around (avoiding the wasp carcasses that decorated the window sill), but I couldn't find anything. It started getting cold, more wasps somehow made it into the bathroom.

I walked in one morning to take a shower and there was a fucking SWARM buzzing around the window. I got some high powered wasp killer and let 'em have it. Die, wasp! Die!

So, now they're coming in through the hall window outside of the bathroom and the window in my office. I moved Hilde's cat hammock and discovered at least (no exaggeration on my part) 100 dead wasps. I vacuumed them and the ones from the bathroom up. Fifteen minutes later, there were more dead wasps. Somehow they are getting into the house and then immediately dying. Maybe they're coming into contact with some of the residue from the wasp killer I was so free with the past couple of weeks.

Today, after I had fortified myself with some Tylenol, I went around and filled any holes or gaps in the windows with caulking. So far since then, I've sucked five live wasps up in the vacuum and cleaned up maybe six or seven dead ones. There's one buzzing around my light as I type right now. It's already dive-bombed me once. HA! I just killed it!

Ack! This is seriously disgusting. Trying to get to the bathroom at night is a problem, as nothing is ickier at 3 in the morning than stepping on dead wasps.

So, I leave you with my question, what the hell is up with that? How are they getting into the house? I've run out of caulk and wasp spray! Dammit! I would go outside and see about elminiating the nest, but it's in an awkward place that I can't reach or even really find. I can only theorize that it's somewhere near the bathroom window, which is on the second floor and tucked up under some eaves. My only hope is that the 31 degree weather will kill the ones that haven't already tried to find refuge in our warm house.



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