So, I was talking to a co-worker at the wee public library and she told me something that, frankly, I'm having a hard time deciding is funny or disturbing. Perhaps disturbingly funny?
There is a woman, a young wife and mother who comes in a lot during my shift and during the night shift. She's lonely and just wants to get out of the house, so, more often than not, we end up chatting. Nice, boring, normal conversation. I don't mind. She's a nice lady.
Her husband, apparently, is very jealous and accuses her of cheating on him all the time. It's not true, but he doesn't believe her.
So, the other night, he asks her why she goes to the library all the time and she says something along the lines of to "talk to my friends, check my e-mail", etc. He then accuses her of having an affair with me.
Let me type that again:
He then accuses her of having an affair with me.
She told my co-worker who gleefully reported it back to me. Can we count all the things that are wrong with that accusation?
1. I am a woman.
2. I am NOT gay.
3. Did I mention that I was NOT gay?
4. Yuck.
Okay. Seriously. How insane is this guy? He sends his mother to cruise past the library to check and make sure she's there, and not somewhere else, doing illicit things with...me, I guess.
Part of me wants to just giggle. Keep your wives at home, men! There's a randy librarian in town! Yes. The wee library is an unbridled pit of lust and betrayal. It's like an episode of Sex in the City, only with more books and...cows. That sounded kind of gross.
The other part of me wants to knock this guy upside the head and tell him to get off his ass and start paying attention to his wife. Maybe if he didn't bore her out of the house every night, he would know where she was.
Because, apparently, she spends her nights with me, having hot, lusty lesbian librarian sex on the book trucks. Yeah. Um hm.
